Category Archives: Super Hero

Batman Hipster

Now by no means do I think of myself as a hipster. I don’t complain about somebody liking a band after they make it big and I do not set trends with my hairstyle or clothing. Quite honestly I always found it confusing that people would be annoyed that their favourite small time band manages to make it big, become “Mainstream” and gain new fans. Surely people know that being as big as possible is a common goal set by artists.

That’s why I am confused by feelings and thoughts I have been having for a few years now. Allow me to explain.

As many young boys do, I loved superheroes as a kid. Whether it be Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, The Caped Crusader of Gotham – Batman, or The Man of Steel himself, Superman. I couldn’t get enough. As a kid, this knowledge was common. However, as I grew, debates with friends over who would win in a certain fight, became more intense. Reasoning evolved, they turned technical. Small discrepancies were examined and every claim refuted. This, helped along by having an older brother just as obsessed with them as I was/am and I have arrived here.  A 20 year old who still thinks to himself “If I could be any Superhero, then who…?”. Don’t get me wrong, i’m glad, and i’m sure i’m not the only one. I know i’m not.

Back to the point, for the past three quarters of my life, I’ve loved superheros. It’s fair to say I know a lot about them. I have come to terms and love the fact that i’m a geek. So when I see somebody I know for a fact doesn’t care about it say something like “I’m so excited for the Batman film, i’m such a geek!”, it makes me kind of mad. I’m all for people beginning to like it, but don’t act like you really care. Don’t act like you have been a fan through the comics, cartoons, books and terrible films. Be honest, now that everyone wants to get in on it, you’re trying to act like you are an old-hand on the super scene. However, the truth is, you jumped on the batman bandwagon and are now trying to act like an all time geek, because it’s popular to be one now. The downside to the plan is, one day when you bring up a superhero in conversation, you may get asked a seemingly simple question. This is when your meager knowledge will fail you, and you shall be outcast from such meetings forever more! Or so i hope.

This is why i have decided to make many small posts, each on a different superhero. I can’t get rid of these fake fans, but i can at least make sure they know enough to pass as a real one.

(Back to an earlier point, if I could be any super, I would choose The Flash or The Hulk. Being the best at one thing is the way forward, the only choice is, fastest or strongest.)


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Superman Vs The Hulk

In a more lighthearted and admittedly geeky vein than my previous posts i want to think on a question that has mystified me for some time. If an unstoppable force collided with an immovable object what would be the outcome? Or from a more amusing viewpoint (and this is where the real geek in me is shown) what if Superman, a being who can only be stopped by kryptonite flew, at full force directly in to the centre of The Hulks chest, what would happen?

Would Superman go straight through? Rip a hole in Hulk, directly through his heart?

Or would The Hulk bounce Superman of his chest like a gorilla would a troublesome fly?

At 6 ft and 1040 lbs (please don’t think i knew this off the top of my head, i checked!) you’d think The Hulk would be a sure thing. However Superman is as powerful as a locomotive, really the only being with hopes of matching Hulks massive strength, he is faster than a speeding bullet, occasionally even matching or surpassing the agility of Flash (My personal favourite Superhero) so you have to think that insane speed coupled with extreme might makes Superman more than capable of busting straight through somebody. Not that The Hulk is just anybody, no-one is on the same level of power as him, and unlike Superman, who,whilst strong, has a peak, Hulk has no peak, the angrier he gets the more powerful he becomes!

So in answer to my self-addressed question i believe it depends on just how mad Hulk is. At a minimum level of anger, sufficient enough only to make him transform from Dr. Banner into The Hulk then i think it could knock Hulk over or just back slightly, but if he was angrier than that then he would definitely demolish Superman.

This led to me wondering about the outcome of a full fight between the two behemoths of the super world. As much as i would love to say i think Hulk would win outright, because i find Superman has too large an array of weaponry at his disposal, from flight and super-strength, to freeze breath and heat vision, which makes him a bit too awesome to find quite as enjoyable as other super heroes. I think it would be a close call, Superman would stand a great chance at first being faster than Hulk as he could use heat vision from afar whilst dodging Hulk or the things he may throw. However Hulk is not the sharpest knife in the drawer and has such has little regard for others life, be they enemy or friend. So eventually he would throw a car containing people or endanger humans in someway meaning Superman would have to concentrate on saving them and not solely defeating Hulk. As he cares too much for the lives of others, including his enemies which is his greatest weakness (other than kryptonite, obviously, but i doubt Hulk has any of this on his person), he does not want to kill. Adversaries have been using this against him for a long, long time.

Once this happened Hulk might get in close enough to do some serious damage as i imagine he would be pretty pissed off at this point and therefore extremely powerful, this would be his one chance to finish off Superman otherwise i am pretty certain he would lose.

Yes, this as been kinda random, but now you know 🙂